Doctor Aur Marij Ke Top 10 Jokes - Best Medicine For Stress

  

girl apani mami ko lekar doctar ke paas gai ..

girl : medical chekap karana hai.

docter :kapade utaar kar parde ke peechhe let jao…

girl : mera nahi, mami ka..

docter : ohh.. maata jee jeebh dikhaie...

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mareejj - do. saahab jodo mein dard rahata hai kya karoon?

do. (mareejj ko gale lagate hue) - jode to bhagavaan banaata hai pagale isamen ham do. kya kar sakate hain ?

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chhagan: - tum operation kare bina hee hospital se kyon bhaag gae?

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magan: - nurse baar baar kah rahi thi ki daro mat, himmat rakho, kuchh nahin hoga .. ye to bas ek chhota sa operation hai!

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chhagan: - to isame darane vaalee kaun see baat hai ? sahi to kah rahi thi nurse !

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magan: - saale, vo mujha se nahi doctor se kah rahi thi !!!

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depression ki shikaar ek mahila doctor se ilaaj karaane aai.

doctor: kya takleef hai aapako?

mahila: sir, dimaag me bahut ulte pulate vichaar aate hai rukate hi nahi ...

doctor: kaise vichaar aate hai ?

mahila: jaise ab me yaha aapake hospital me aai to aapake OPD me ek bhi patient  nahi tha ... to me sochane lagi ki doctor saahab ke pas koi bhi patient  nahi hai, inaki kamai kaise hogi ghar kaise chalega, itana paisa daala padhai me, ab kya karenge ... hospital banane me bhi bahut paisa lagaya hoga, ab lon kaise chukaenge ? kahi karz se pareshaan hokar latak to nahin jaenge ek din ... aise kuchh vichaar aate rahate hai !

ab doctor depression mein hai ...

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ek old man ke dil ka operation hone vaala tha.

Operation unaka damad karane vaala tha jo ki us hospital ka sabase bada sarjan tha.

jaise hi damad sarjan Operation karane aaya, old man bole – “beta, mujhe tumase kuchh kahana hai … agar is Operation ke dauraan mujhe kuchh ho jaye to tumhari saas ko tumhe apane ghar me hi rakhana hoga … unaka khayaal rakhana !”

kahane kee jaroorat nahi, Operation 100 fisadei safal raha !!!

 

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doctor:-tabiyat kaisi hai..?

mareej:-pahale se jyada kharaab hai…

doctor:-dawai kha li thi.?

mareejj:-khali nahin thi bhari hui thi…

doctor:- mera matalab hai dawai le li thi.?

mareej:-ji aap hi se to li thi…

doctor:-bewkuf !! dawai pi li thi.?

mareej:-nahi ji,, dawai nili thi…

doctor:-abe gadhe !! dawai ko pi liya tha.?

mareej:-nahi ji, piliya to mujhe tha…

doctor:- ulloo ke patthe !! dawai ko munh mein rakh liya tha.?

mareej:- nahin aap hi ne to kaha tha ki freezer mein rakhana…..

doctor:- abe kya maar khayega..?

mareej:- nahi ji dawai khaunga…

doctor:-nikal yahan se sale, tu pagal kar dega…

mareej:- thik hai ja raha hu, phir kab aau..?

doctor:- ab marane ke baad aana …

mareej:- marane ke kitane din baad.?

doctor behosh….

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Doctor : aapakI bimari ki asal vajah mere samajh mein nahi aa rahi, ho sakata hai, sharaab peene kee vajah se aisa ho raha ho .

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patiaint : koi baat nahi doktar saahab, jab aapaki utar jae tab main chek-ap  ke  lie dobara aa jaunga .…

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bahar ek ladki jor se ro rahi thi

doctor dukan ke bahar dekhane aaya

ladki – doctor sahab jaldi se mere bimare sahi kar do

doktar – tumako kya bimari hai ?

ladakee – me jab bhi shisa dekhati hu

mujhe ultiya aane lagati hai

doctor – ye koi bimari nahi hai

tere sakl hi aisi hai

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ladki roti hui doctor ke paas pahuchi

ladki – doctor sahab mujhe thik kar do

doktar – kya hua hai tumhe

ladakee – main 25 saal ki ho gayi

par mere bache nahi hui

doctor – shadi ko kitne saal hue

ladki –

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abhi shadi nahi hui

doctor – to kambakht shadi to kar le pahale  

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santa doctor se – jab main apani bivi ko
kis karata hu to bahut badbu aati hai
doctor – nahi aisa nahi ho sakata
santa – bivi meri hai mujhe pata hai
badbu aati hai
doctor –
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lekin jab mene kiya tha to
lipastik ki khushabu aa rahi thi