Best Kaoojusi Ke Jokes - Baniya Is Allmost Kanjoos

Titanic Ke Saath Kanjoos Bhi Doob Raha Tha
Aur Hans Bhi Raha Tha
Dost: Oye,, Tu Hans Kyun Raha Hai?
Kanjoos: Shukr Hai Main Ne Return Ticket Nahi Khareeda…

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Kanjush Ne Arbi Ko Khoon De Kar Uski Jaan Bachai.
Arbi Ne Usey Mercedes Gift Kardi.
Arbi Ko Phir Khoon Ki Zarurut Padi,
Kanjoos Ne Phir Khoon Diya.
Ab Ke Baar Arbi Ne Laddu Gift Kiye,
Kanjoos: Gusse Se, “Mercedez Kyun Nahi Di?”
Arbi: Munna,, Ab Hamare Andar Bhi Kanjoos Ka Khoon Daud Raha Hai.

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A Kanjoos On His Death Time.
My Wife, Where R U ?
Wife:Yes, Im Here
My Sons & Daughters Ru All Here?
Yes, Papa
Kanjoos:To Phir Baju Wale Kamre
Ka Pankha Q Khula Hay

 

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1 Kanjoos Tha,
Bilkul Kanjoos Tha,
Khalis Kanjoos Tha,
Bohut Ziada Kanjoos Tha,
Aap Mat Ghabrao
Aap K Samne To Wo Kuch B Nei Tha,

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Udhar Aap Majboor Bêthe Hai, Idher Ham Majboor Bethe Hai !

Baat Ho To Aakhir Kaisay Ho,

Jab Dono Taraf  2 Kanjoos Bethe Hain.

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Kanjoos: Yeh Kela Kitne Ka Hai.
Dukandaar: 1 Rupaya
Kanjoos: 60 Paisa Ka De Do.
Dukandaar: 60 Paise Me Toh Sirf Chhilka Milega.
Kanjoos: Yeh Le 40 Paise, Chhilka Rakhle Aur Sirf Kela De De.

Kanjoos Baniya Apane Ladake Ko Buri Tarah Peet Raha Tha,

Laat Ghoonson Se Maar Raha Tha,

Padosi – Kyon Maar Rahe Ho Bechaare Ko ?

Kanjoos Ki Baat Sunakar Padosi Ka

Heart Fail  Hone Se Bacha,

Kanjoos Bachche Ke Kaan Pe Chaanta Marate Hue Bola –

Isako Bola Tha,

Ek Sidhi Chhodakar Sidhiyaan Chadhana ,

Chappal Kaam Ghisegi ,

Saala Do Sidhi Chhodakar Chadha ,

Pajaama Faad Laaya

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Kanjoosi Ka Kampatition
Santa – Bhai Main Bahut Kanjoos Hoon ,
Banta – Kaise ?
Santa – Main Hanimoon Pe Aadhe Paise Bachaane Ke Lie Akela Hee Gaya Tha ,
Banta – Ye To Kuchh Bhi Nahin ,,
Maine To Poore Paise Bachaane Ke Lie ,
Apane Dost Ke Saath Patni Ko Hanimoon Pe Bhej Diya Tha
 

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Baniya Ko Bhoot Chad Gaya.
3 Din Baad Bhoot Khud Ojha Ke Paas Gaya Aur Bola :-
Mujhe Baahar Nikaalo,
Varna Mai Bhookha Mar Jaugaan.

 

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Kanjoos Baniya 14 Vi Manjil Se Niche Gira.
Girate Vakt Usane Apane Ghar Ki Khidaki Se
Dekha Ki Bivi Khana Bana Rahi Hai.
Baniya Chillaaya :- “Meri Roti Mat Pakana”

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Kanjoos Baniya Haath Me Blade Maar Raha Tha.

Bivi:- Ye Kya Kar Rahe Ho Ji ??

Baniya:-

Daittol Ki Shishi Toot Gai Hai

Kahi Daittol Barabaad Na Ho Jae.

La Teri Bhi Uganli Kaat Doon.