Santa Ke Jokes-Santa Banta Best Jokes

      

Santa Apni Biwi Ke Saath So Raha Tha Tabhi 

Achanak Bolta Hai: Bheega Sa Lagta Hai 

Aalam Mujhe, Bheegi Si Lagti Hai Subah Mujhe, Bheega Lag Raha Hai Saara Jahan Mujhe...
Jeeto: Kisne Kaha Tha Ki Raat Ko Daba Kar Beer Piyo... Oye Shayar Ki Aulad Tumne Bistar Pe Peshaab Kar Diya Hai.

 
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Santa Ko Loose Motions Ki Problem Ho Gayi 

Toh Vo Doctor Ke Paas Gaya Aur Bola:

Doctor Ji, Mere Dast Rukne Ka Naam Nahin Le Rahe, Kuch Achcha Sa Ilaaz Bataiiye.
Doctoe: Tumne Kela Try Kiya Tha?
Santa: Haan Doctor Saab, Kiya Toh Tha... Lekin Jab Nikaala Toh Phir Suru Ho Gaye.

 

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Biwi Se Pareshaan Santa Ne Suicide Karne Ki 

Decide Kar Liya Aur Paanchve Floor Se Kudne Hi Waala Tha Ki Uski Biwi Ne Andar Se Awaaz Lagayi: 

Aji Sunte Ho, Meri Kuch College Days Ki Friends Aayi Hain... Andar Aa Jao... Aapki Pechaan Karwa Deti Hun Sab Se...
Santa: Haan... Haan... Ek Minute Mein Aaaya.


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Santa Ka Promotion Hua Aur Vo Apni Company Mein Manager Ban Gaya. Ghar Aatey Hi Apni Biwi Jeeto Se Bola: O Jeeto Ji, Ab Tum Ek Manager Ke Saath Ghumogi Aur Shopping Karogi Aur Movies Dekhogi Aur Aish Karogi...
Jeeto, Khusi Se: Achcha... Sach Mein... Kis Ke Saath... Sharma Ji Ke Saath Ya Gupta Ki Saath...???

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Ek Bike Waale Ne Address Puchne Ke Liye Santa Se Pucha: Excuse Me.... Mujhe Rose Garden Jaana Hai...
Santa: Toh Jaa Na Bhai... Aise Sabko Ruk-Ruk Ke Batayega Toh Pahunchga Kab ?


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Bhikhari: 10 Rs Ka Sawaal Hai !
Santa: Pucho... Pucho... Kya Pata Mujhe Aate Hi Ho!!
Us Din Se Bhikhari Ne Bheekha Maangna Chod Di....

Santa: Tera Bhai Aajakal Kya Kar Raha Hai ?
Banta: Ek Dukaan Kholi Thi, Par Ab Jel Mein Hai !
Santa: Vo Kyo  ?
Banta: Dukaan Hathode Se Kholi Thi !


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Santa Apane Dost Banta Se Kahata Hai:-
Banta Collage Se Mera Result Dekh Aana Aur Aakar Batana. Ghar Par Mere Mami Paapa Mere Saath Honge.
Yadi Main Ek Vishay Mein Faill Hua To Kahana..
Jay Shree Raam…
Aur Do Mein Faill Hua To Kahana..
Jay Shree Krshn Jay Shree Krshn
Aur Teen Mein Phel Hua To Kahana..
Brahma Vishanoo Mahesh Ki Jay..
Banta Collage Se Result
Dekh Kar Aaya Aur Bola:
“Bol Sanche Darabar Ki Jay”


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Teacher : A B C  Sunao..
Santa: A B C
Teacher: Aur Sunao…
Santa: Aur Sab Badhiya, Aap Sunao !

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Santa Udaas Baitha Pani Me Pathar Maar Raha Tha..
Ek Medhak Nikal Kar Bola..
“Pani Me Aa Teri Udaasi Utaru Saale,
Apani  Vaali Ke Chakkar Me Meri Vaali Ka Sir Fhod Diya.”

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Santa: Ham Pati-Patni Tamil Sikhana Chahate Hai !
Banta: Vo Kyon ?
Santa:
Hamane Ek Tamil Bachcha God Liya Hai !
Ham Sochate Hain Jab Vo Bolane Lage To Usase Pahale Pahale Ham Tamil Sikh Len !